Boys Growing Up

“Guys have this macho thing going, but you have to be able to talk to somebody. You can’t stay bundled up inside. You can’t, because you’ll explode.”

Jim
Boys on Bullying

As boys grow up, they begin to change physically and emotionally. They may feel vulnerable and alone. Just when boys need a lot of support, many are afraid to ask for it. “I thought if I was a real man I could handle things myself,” says 18-year-old Ernesto.

Wilson, age 15, agrees. “We get a lot of messages about what it means to be a man,” he says. “We’re supposed to act tough, never cry. At the same time we’re supposed to be sensitive and understanding. It seems impossible to be both.”

Dr. Eli Newberger, Harvard Medical School, says a relationship with an adult a young person trusts can be lifesaving. “Every boy and girl should have at least one person who will always be there for them,” he says, “who won’t abandon them, who will place priority on communicating with them, who will advocate for them when needed.”

You can be a role model for the young people in your life by showing them that asking for help and expressing emotion are OK.

Remember: Parents can help their children open up by saying, “Growing up is hard. If you have worries, I hope you’re sharing them. I don’t want you to worry alone.” When you invite children to share their worries, it’s important to really listen.”1

Read Issues and Answers at wordscanwork.com for more about this topic.

1. Dr. Paula Rauch, Massachusetts General Hospital

© 2006 Blake Works, Inc.

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